According to HippocraTech, as reported by Joystiq, a new game called Glucoboy is set to forever change the standards of what the normal gamer expects from their videogame, that is, to ask for blood in order to play it.

The game, compatible with GameBoy Advance and the DS Lite, is intended to make monitoring glucose levels for diabetic children more fun. At Guidence Interactive Healthcare, they’re (according to their website) “dedicated to making healthcare a bit more manageable,” unfortunately, they plan on doing it by making videogames a bit more scary. You horrific bastards.

The adventure inside the adventure.

Why do people do this to children? By incorporating their blood into a creepy video game, they’ve incorporated something that is supposed to be about pure, unmitigated joy and turned it into a retarded plot from some sci-fi epic. What’s next? Drugtestboy and the Amazing Methamphetamines?

Inspiring less trust in videogames is just wrong, consider the number of crappy games a year you play, then consider having to use your blood to play them. Does that added bloody variable make you more or less likely to do something? So, perhaps instead of ruining one of the few, pure joys a kid has why not turn checking their blood into some sort of awesome responsibility? Frankly, I don’t care what you do, just leave the videogames out of this sick, draconian blood letting.

(At the time of publication, not a single screenshot of this creepy game is available, which only deepens our suspicions of this reprehensible title. What are they trying to hide!?)

More blood.
Speculative artist sketch of Glucoboy gameplay